Ready or Not?
Change Step 4
Are you ready?
PeaceBuilders team is of the opinion that you're ready to change poor behavior patterns when you feel a desire for positive growth and notice the impact on your relationship.
When you're open to feedback, set realistic goals, and understand the need for improvement.
Feeling emotionally prepared, seeking support, and valuing the well-being of both yourself and your partner indicate readiness for positive change in your relationship.
Readiness = Importance x Confidence
Being ready means that you are open to the possibility that you might have to change some of your present or past behavior!
PeaceBuilders (or someone else) telling you to change your behavior or what to do does not work.
It did not work for me either! (and it did not work for our teenage children)
We will just defend your current behavior and come up with reasons for not changing or acting in a different way.
Instead, science seems to suggest that it is better to understand how ready you are to make the change and then support and encourage you to succeed with the right tools and programs.
Research shows that starting or changing a behavior depends on two factors:
Firstly, whether you feel the change or behavior is important enough to you
Secondly, it is about the confidence you have in yourself to make the change or behavior.
Readiness = Importance x Confidence
That is it! Are you ready to make it happen or is the pain to change not enough... yet?
Give that a thought and emagine if it gets worst, what then?
Extract from: Owning our Struggles by Minaa B. 2023
Ready for change?
Radical acceptance means learning to observe life through a solution-focused lens by identifying the problem, observing the significance of the problem and impact on your life, and then to move forward without treating the problem as your identity. Instead , you see the problem as an experience and one that you can play a role in changing.
We can get stuck in victim mode by assuming our healing is dependent on other people making choices that serve us, instead of us making choices to better serve ourselves.
It’s you who will face the consequences of your choices, whether they are good or bad.
Disclaimer:
This website is for information only. It represents the unproven opinions / thoughts of various authors or collaborating partners.
This website and its content is not intended to serve as a substitute for professional medical or counselling advice.
PeaceBuilders Network and/ or associate organizations specifically disclaim any and all liability contained in or linked to this website.
A health-care professional should be consulted regarding your specific medical condition.
If you have a medical, mental health or other emergency, then reach out to the local emergency services helpline or hospital.
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Updated: November 2023
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