7 Principles of living
Respect
Dignity & honour
Having respect in a relationship is treating each other with dignity and honor.
It's crucial for mutual understanding and a healthy connection.
It is the foundation of building trust.
Respect means valuing each other's thoughts, feelings, and boundaries.
It's the key to maintaining a strong and honorable relationship, where both partners feel valued and appreciated.
Handouts: Home Improvement: Men in Relationship Jan 2024
Key Points: AI Summary
Mutual Respect
Respect means valuing who the other person is and respecting their boundaries.
Does your partner listen and back off when you say you’re uncomfortable?
Does your partner appreciate you as you are, without expecting you to act like someone else?
Handouts: Home Improvement: Men in Relationship Jan 2024
Key Points: AI Summary
Secrets of Effective Communication
Empathy:
Find some truth in what the other person is saying, even if it seems unreasonable or unfair.
Put yourself in their shoes and see the world from their perspective.
Paraphrase their words to show understanding.
Acknowledge their feelings based on what they said.
Ask gentle, probing questions to learn more about their thoughts and feelings.
Assertiveness:
Express your own ideas and feelings directly and tactfully.
Use "I feel" statements (e.g., "I feel upset") instead of "you" statements (e.g., "You're wrong!").
Respect:
Show respect, even if you are frustrated or angry.
Find something genuinely positive to say, even during a conflict.
How to transform from self - neglect to self - respect
Why its worth listening to people you disagree with
Handouts: Home Improvement: Men in Relationship Jan 2024
Key Points: AI Summary
Conflict with Respect
Arguments can help solve problems or make things worse. The key is respect.
Can you respect your partner even when you're upset?
Dangerous: The "Negative Start-Up"
Example: "Why am I the only one who does any cleaning around here?"
Problems:
Exaggerates the truth.
Ignores your partner’s positive qualities.
Often spoken in a hostile tone.
Instead: Use a "Softened Start-Up"
Be concise.
Complain without blaming.
Start with something positive.
Use "I" statements instead of "you."
Describe what’s happening without judging.
Clearly state what you need.
Be polite and express appreciation.
Don’t store up grievances.
Express feelings using vulnerable emotions.
Example: "I know you've been busy with the kids, but I could really use some help with the kitchen."
Avoid Unfair Behavior (Disrespect)
Don’t use name-calling or put-downs.
Don’t bring up old issues.
Stay on topic.
Don’t threaten or intimidate.
Don’t view arguments as winning or losing.
Don’t save up complaints to dump all at once.
Avoid assuming the worst about your partner; ask instead.
Don’t deny facts; be honest.
Don’t gloat if you get your way.
Don’t sulk, ignore, pout, withdraw, or give the silent treatment.
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Updated: November 2023
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